What Do You See in the Families Around You?

What a strange culture we are living in.  Everything is being turned on its head.  Good is bad and bad is good.  It’s fascinating to watch and horrifying to consider the inevitable outcome of this topsy turvy society.

I remember well the books and films I ingested as a child, they were full of themes and morals about consequences and personal responsibility.  Children’s stories were focused on bravery and selflessness.  I was disciplined (through corporal punishment) in order to ensure a virtuous upbringing.  I was not the most important person in my household as a child – in fact, I was pretty far down on the list of importance.

That’s not how children are being raised today.

Looking around at contemporary culture and the families I see around me, I am amazed at the difference in child rearing that is accepted today.  In so many families, the child is the center of the family.  This single issue might be the greatest concern families face today.  Children are naturally self-focused; they do not need that idea re-enforced from their parents.  I am seeing families where the baby’s schedule determines the schedule of the family, not to mention the schedule of older children – to the detriment of the parents.  I am seeing adults who were so spoiled as children they cannot get along with a spouse over simple, typical living-in-a-house-together issues.

Children’s books now tout “tolerance,” “open-mindedness” and “not judging others” as virtues to replace those I learned as a child.  We are taking away our children’s ability to make sound judgements and wise decisions.  At the same time, we are refusing to ensure they understand how the world works through understanding consequences and personal responsibility.  Children are taught to love themselves and about self-care, long before they are taught to sacrifice for their families and to serve others.

I was speaking to a grandfather at a local pool recently who was complaining that his grandson, whom he and his wife have been helping to babysit, will directly refuse to help his wife when she asks him to do something as simple as set the table.  The grandfather just shook his head and wished his daughter would do something about that.  If I were him, I would have had the daughter do something about it or refuse to watch her brat.  Or I would have taken matters into my own hands and disciplined the child until he realized that helping is part of being a family member.  But leaving the child to continue to be selfish is not an option – it is not good for that child, the family, or society.

A lot of this is obvious to all of us.  But I wanted to mention some resources for teaching some of these old-fashioned character traits to the young people in your lives.

Our family listens to Adventures in Odyssey which is a radio drama from Focus on the family.  It teaches Biblical lessons and character traits and your local library probably has some CDs available to borrow if you want to try them out before purchasing.  Also, Jonathan Park is a radio drama series that teaches character traits using stories focusing on Creation Science.  Finally, a non-Christian option that teaches Conservative principles that my kids really enjoy hearing are the Tuttle Twins books.  Tuttle Twins has books for both elementary kids and for teenagers.

And, even better, talking to the kids and parents in your lives and sharing your values and stories with them is the best thing you can do.  These younger generations are thirsty for true relationships and that is a gift that can truly change lives and families and our society for the better.

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