In Part LXXXV last week, there was a little ditty about Joe, Jim, Jill, Bill and another Joe. This week there will be an examination of how the navy went from boot camp to camping it up.
During the first week of May several news organizations noticed that the U.S. Navy had since 2022 been using a drag queen as one of its digital ambassadors to help it meet its shortfalls in recruiting. The controversy seems to suggest that Anheuser-Busch InBev is using the same third party marketing firm that the Pentagon is, and the Defense Department has apparently not reflected that perhaps the reason it fails to meet its recruiting goals is that in trying to appeal to the margins of society, the Navy and other armed services may be alienating those large swaths of the population that long served as its recruiting base.
Not everyone associated with the Navy is pleased with the decision. Rob O’Neill, who arguably was the Navy operator who carried out the most important part of the most significant naval operation of the 21st century, was unhappy, though a Navy Commander was found who thought it was a good idea. Our editor at these pages had thoughts to express on the matter, as well.
Those who were critical of the Wagner Group’s scouring of Russian prison cells to find “volunteers” to fight as mercenary cannon fodder in the former Soviet republic’s ‘special operation” in Ukraine have not opined about this desperate recruiting measure, but it should seem beyond question that Vladimir Putin will not be likely to copy this move. Oddly enough, this is not the first time the Navy has tried to use a drag act in its recruiting effort.
In the late 1970s, there was a musical and dance group known as The Village People. They specialized in a sort of reverse drag in that the performers donned hyper masculine costumes such as an Indian chief, cowboy, soldier, construction worker and police officer, while singing and dancing to songs that had barely disguised innuendos about homosexuality, such as “Macho Man” and “YMCA”. One of their biggest hits was “In the Navy”, where one of the choruses chanted “They want you, they want you,
They want you as a new recruit.”, which was as much a double entendre about grooming new initiates into their lifestyle as it called for military recruitment. The Navy failed to recognize the campy call to behavior then prohibited under the Uniform Code of Military Justice (UCMJ) might be problematic and received permission from The Village People to use the song in their recruiting efforts, in exchange for letting The Village People film their official video on one of their vessels at the San Diego naval base. While the song was never a major part of naval recruitment effort.
Since Congress repealed the prohibitions against homosexual behavior in the UCMJ during the Obama administration, the Navy has gone from using a song of the Village People to embracing the lifestyle they promoted in order to meet their recruiting goals. I have updated the lyrics to reflect the drag forms the navy now supports.
Where can you find pleasure
Doing what you treasure
Behave narcissistically
Where can you begin
To entertain the fellas
On the land or on the sea
Where can you serve the flag
As you prance in deep drag
Make TikTok pornography
Shoot the crew a full moon
Maybe sing a show tune
Give out a lap dance for free
In the navy
Yes, you can sail the seven seas
In the navy
Catch monkeypox and S T Ds
In the navy
Serve your country, I suppose
In the navy, (in the navy)
As you dress in women’s clothes
In the navy
Sailor hats and panty hose
In the navy
You can vogue and you can pose
In the navy
Be the gender that you chose
In the navy, in the navy, in the navy
They want you, they want you
They want you as a new recruit
They want you, they want you
They want you as a new recruit
If you like perversion
No need for conversion
They’ll recruit you as you are
Don’t you hesitate
Your buttocks to gyrate
You’ll be the next naval star
There’s no one who’s too young
To enjoy a drag show
You can set your courage free
To deny would be a sin
According to Biden
Just like with the surgery
In the navy
You can serve on land and sea
In the navy
Don’t dare test for H I V
In the navy, in the navy, in the navy
In the navy
Come on be bold and make a stand
In the navy, in the navy
Sometimes a girl sometimes a man
In the navy
Come on, and wear your mother’s dress
In the navy
You know no one will like you less
In the navy
Maybe an admiral you’ll impress
In the navy, in the navy, in the navy, in the navy
They want you, they want you
They want you as a new recruit
Who me?
They want you, they want you
They want you as a new recruit
But, but, but, I’m allergic to makeup
Hey, hey look
Man, I get sick watchin’ “The Crying Game”
They want you
Oh, my goodness
They want you
What am I gonna do in a spike heels?
They want you
They want you
In the navy
They want you (transpeople, what?)
They want you
In the navy
They want you
They want you
In the navy
Yes sir, no sir, yes sir
(In the navy) Yes sir, no sir, yes sir
(In the navy) Aye aye, sir
Forget about those butch SEALS
Just let out your girl squeals
Enjoy a gender fluid role
No need to be hasty
Fasten on each pasty
Shimmy down that big brass pole
Where can you learn to fly
While dressed up as a guy
Then slip on an evening gown
You can have the most fun
Playing with your top gun
Going up or going down
In the navy
Yes, you can sail the seven seas
In the navy
Switching genders as you please
In the navy
Isn’t every drag show grand
In the navy, in the navy
Do a cartwheel and hand stand
In the navy
In a dress like what was planned
In the navy
Prettier than any man
In the navy
Dancing that they dare not ban
In the navy, in the navy, in the navy
In the navy
Yes, you can sail the seven seas
In the navy
Catch monkeypox and S T Ds
In the navy
Switching genders as you please
In the navy, in the navy
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