The Guardians of Gaia: A Dystopian Vision of Our Future
In a world plagued by environmental crises, a secretive group known as the Guardians of Gaia has emerged, dedicated to protecting the planet at all costs.
Satire
Satire: Generation ‘Girly’ Men: The Great Masculine Makeover
Today in Cloft’s Corner, Dave explores our history of manly men and decries the pajama boys who now seem to dominate society.
President Eisenhower’s “I Told You So” Moment: The Eye-Popping Costs of Military Expenditures
Today in Cloft’s Corner, Dave channels President Eisenhower and his warning, “Beware the Military Industrial Complex.”
The Climate Extremists’ Wild Plan: Reducing Carbon by Phasing Out Humans
Climate extremists”seem to have found the ultimate solution to the carbon problem: reducing the carbon footprint of the planet by eliminating the source of it all – humans!
From Gender Surgeons to Cash Crumbles: Dr. Cashgrab’s Misadventures in Identity Alteration
Today in Cloft’s Corner, Dave follows the adventures of Dr. Cashgrab as he enriches himself in the growing field of identity alteration.
Top Gun Aces Cry Foul as AI Drones Crush Their Egos: It’s Fluffy the Woke Pilot vs. the ‘Cheating’ Machines!
In a stunning turn of events, the skies are filled with the wails and moans of top gun ace fighter jock pilots from the Air Force and Navy.
Satanic Worshippers Cry Foul Over Ten Commandments
“Satanic Worshippers Cry Foul Over Ten Commandments: It’s Hard to Sin When God’s Rules Get in the Way!”
Board Meeting: Satan Congratulates His Demonic Dream Team for Pandemic Success and Aims for an Even More Evil Year Ahead!
Today in Cloft’s Corner, Dave channels C.S. Lewis as he imagines Satan directing his demons in further devilment after a successful year.
Karen Brigade Declares War on Pickups: Protecting Society from Assault Drunk Trucks
In a stunning display of correlation-based crusading, a group of self-proclaimed “Karens” has emerged from the depths of suburbia, armed with their statistical prowess and signature haircuts.
Living Behind Enemy Lines, Tale #92: “You Are A White Supremacist, Aren’t You Diane?”
By the time I stopped laughing, the indoctrinated reporter had gathered what wits he had and stuttered “how many white supremacists do you know?” Laughing again, I asked him what made him think I would be acquainted with the four “white supremacists” in Oregon.
The Miracle Drug
In the summer of 2099, researchers developed a new groundbreaking drug. When ingested this new medication impaired one’s ability to judge others.
BREAKING: Marco Rubio Appointed as Interim Grand Nagus of the Ferengi Alliance
President Trump announced today that in the spirit of not only international relations, but also interstellar amity, he has given U.S. Secretary of State Marco Rubio, permission to accept the position of Interim Grand Nagus of the Ferengi Alliance.
Wine: Humanity’s Original Survival Hack (aka Liquid Sanitation with Style)
Let’s face it—if you think water is safe, congratulations, you’re probably not living in the first century. Wells and cisterns looked innocent, but sip a cup and you might as well have been drinking a smoothie of bacteria, dirt, and whatever poor soul didn’t wash their hands yesterday. People back then didn’t know about germs—they just knew that gulping down that “clear” liquid was a roll of the dice with your intestines.
America’s “Orange Army”: The Defense Nobody Budgeted For
China struts around with its Red Army. Washington struts around with the most expensive military on the planet—a force that burns through billions on drag shows at bases and PowerPoints about pronouns.
BREAKING: Canada Urged to Ban Bic Lighters, Matches to Save Michigan from Smoky Summer
Hillman, MI — The skies above Michigan this week resembled the inside of a Waffle House kitchen at 2 a.m., thanks to yet another aromatic delivery of Canadian wildfire smoke, generously exported from our friendly neighbors to the north.
Don Surber’s Highlights of the Week; Making Advertisements Great Again
Once again, Don Surber is back with his weekly highlights and acerbic wit, lampooning various and sundry leftists.
The Tyranny of Our Tech Shackles: A Satirical Take on NSA Tracking Devices
Ah, the good old days when privacy was a thing, and our phones were just for making calls and playing pranks on old people… “Hello Ma’am, is your refrigerator running?”
Stirring the Gravy
With apologies to Jeff Foxworthy, the celebrated comedian best known for his iconic: “You might be a Redneck if (and other topics) …” Here is my version that is devoted to those claiming Italian ancestry who participated in the annual San Marziale festivities at Holy Angels Church in Kulpmont, Pennsylvania last Sunday.
Tin Foil and Other Scarce Commodities
Alone, with a hot cup of nature’s stimulant, perusing the news releases of the day. Paper gold trading sideways (as always). Silver stuck in mid-twenties. Crypto trolls extolling the get-rich-quick virtues of their particular version of blockchain tokens. Joey Robinette mumbling something about vaccines and you know, the other latest thing he can’t remember…..
It’s 2025 and We Still Have 1-7/8” and 2” Hitch Balls? Who Hurt Us?
America: land of freedom, innovation, and baffling trailer ball sizes. We split the atom, landed on the moon, and built an internet where people argue about pineapple on pizza—but somehow, we still can’t agree on a standard trailer hitch ball.