NASCAR hardest hit.
ITEM 1: Max Cohen tweeted with a video, “After returning from Ukraine, Mark Kelly tells reporters he heard from injured soldiers in a hospital that ‘they’ll fight with rocks and sticks if they have to.’ ”
Good. Next time send them rocks and sticks and leave our tanks and missiles here.
ITEM 2: Sure, Trump’s ending the Ukraine War, but Democrats ask what about the price of eggs?
Agriculture Secretary Brooke Rollins said, “The average cost of a dozen eggs has now gone down $1.85 since we announced our plan about a week-and-a-half ago.”
The plan is simple. Stop killing laying hens.
ITEM 3: Newsweek reported, “The 8-month pregnant wife of pro-Palestinian student activist Mahmoud Khalil has pled for her husband’s release in time for the birth of their baby, following his arrest and detention by federal immigration officers over the weekend.”
So send her back to Gaza with him. The family that Hamas together stays together—until the pager beeps.
ITEM 4: Dorothy Neufeld reported, “The U.S. has the largest trade deficit globally, at $1.1 trillion in 2023, growing from $541.6 billion in two decades.”
USA trade deficit by country: Red China $270 billion, Mexico $157 billion, Vietnam $113 billion, Ireland $80 billion and so on.
Oh no. The trade wars are going to make us wealthy again.
ITEM 5: BBC reported, “A new four-lane highway cutting through tens of thousands of acres of protected Amazon rainforest is being built for the COP30 climate summit in the Brazilian city of Belém.”
I figured out how to get around environmental rules. Host a climate change summit.
ITEM 6: NYT reported, “Republican Refers to Transgender Member as a Man, Cutting Short a House Hearing.”
If you have a member, you’re a man.
ITEM 7: Kash Patel tweeted, “Following efforts with our interagency partners, I can report that a career Director-level employee at U.S. Customs and Border Protection has been charged with allegedly attempting to defraud FEMA, as well as lying to federal agents.
“This is part of the new FBI’s renewed efforts to crack down on public corruption and deliver accountability for the American people.”
I’m not saying the suspect, Serina Baker-Hill, 55, is guilty but defrauding FEMA sounds like a good way to kill time while you are not protecting the border.
SubscribedITEM 8: Rupert Murdoch’s Wall Street Journal sneered, “President Trump wanted a trade war with the world, and Americans are getting it, good and hard. Stock prices continued to decline on Tuesday amid the latest Canada-U.S. tariff tit-for-tat. By the end of the day the two sides were talking about a temporary truce, but who knows which side of the tariff bed Mr. Trump will wake up on Wednesday?”
Oh no! Murdoch might have to pay a bob more for that newsprint he imports from Canada.
ITEM 9: WSJ also reported, “One of the Biggest Victims of Trump’s Metals Tariffs: The Ford F-150. New costly steel, aluminum tariffs threaten to boost car prices, dent automaker profits.”
Paragraphs 18 and 19 said:
The amount of aluminum in an average U.S. vehicle was on pace to grow about 30% over the past decade, to more than 500 pounds this year, according to a 2023 Ducker Carlisle report. The auto industry is now the largest user of aluminum in the U.S., according to industry data.
U.S. production of aluminum in smelters, also known as primary aluminum, has been declining for decades, leaving the auto industry more reliant on imports, especially from Canada.
So car companies are using more aluminum but buying less American aluminum.
Double the tariffs then. Re-open the aluminum plants.
ITEM 10: Disney’s ABC tweeted, “President Donald Trump and Elon Musk’s controversial showcase of Tesla cars in front of the White House has set off alarms around Washington over what some see as an infomercial for the billionaire’s car company on high-profile government property.”
Sherman, set the Wayback Machine to August 5, 2021, when ABC reported, “Biden touts electric vehicle goals as boon for climate, economy and jobs.”
The story said, “After signing the order, he ran over to a Jeep Wrangler 4xe, took off his suit jacket, got behind the wheel and took the electric SUV for a short spin.”
Rumor has it that FJB drove it to a gas station to get a fill-up.
ITEM 11: Breitbart reported, “A masked man vandalized a Tesla charging station and attempted to burn it down using Molotov cocktails in North Charleston, South Carolina, ultimately setting himself on fire in the process. The maniac spray-painted ‘Long live Ukraine’ next to a vulgar message aimed at President Trump at the scene.”
Florida Man needs to up his game.
ITEM 12: Fortune reported, “Vandalize Tesla property and the White House will prosecute you as a domestic terrorist, Trump pledges.”
He’ll protect Tesla like a Democrat mayor protects gay pride crosswalks.
ITEM 13: Collin Rugg tweeted with video, “Track runner Alaila Everett charged with assault & battery after hitting a runner in the head with a baton at a track meet.
“Everett claims her hand simply slipped which resulted in the other runner Kaelen Tucker, getting a concussion & possibly fractured skull.”
Every day in America is quickly becoming dawn on Black Friday at Walmart.
ITEM 14: Nick Sortor tweeted with video, “WATCH: A reporter just HIT President Trump with a microphone. But 47 handled it like a PRO.”
Is Alaila Everett moonlighting as a White House correspondent?
ITEM 15: CBS tweeted, “A Pennsylvania man was caught trying to carry a live turtle through airport security by hiding the reptile in his pants, the Transportation Security Administration said Tuesday.”
I trust it wasn’t a snapping turtle.
ITEM 16: The Washington Free Beacon reported, “UN Judge, Onetime Columbia University Human Rights Fellow, Found Guilty of Slavery.”
Best comment at Instapundit, “For every male slave earning nothing, a female slave earns only 88 percent of nothing.”
ITEM 17: Twitter Trending tweeted, “Jack Dorsey’s X Account Locked: A Platform Creator’s Suspension.”
Well, he can always start his own Twitter. Oh wait, he did.
ITEM 18: Former EPA Administrator Gina McCarthy, “It seems that there’s now a change in mission of [the] EPA, according to the administrator, that is really shifting us to a golden age of pollution.”
As EPA administrator, the agency dumped 3 million gallons of toxic waste into the Animas River, the worst such catastrophe in U.S. history. Nearly a decade later, the toxins remain in the riverbed.
Sierra Tango Foxtrot Union, Gina.
ITEM 19: Forbes ran a piece “At Little-Known Health Agency, DOGE Ends Dream ‘To Make A Difference.’ ”
The little agency has 2,000 employees and an annual budget of more than $10 billion a year. It still has photos of Biden and Harris on its wall.
ITEM 20: Adam Schiff said, “I’m a hard NO on the Republican spending bill. On cloture. On all of it. When a wannabe dictator is trying to seize power, it must not be given to him.”
Chuck Schumer wrote, “Trump and Musk Would Love a Shutdown. We Must Not Give Them One.”
Democrats are as united as the Hatfields and the McCoys as they say in Mingo County, West Virginia.
ITEM 21: Fox tweeted, “DOGE says 239 contracts canceled over 2 days, including a grant to teach trans farmers about ‘food justice.’ ”
Food justice for the tranny farmers? Wouldn’t it be cheaper to send them each a cas of Bud Light?
ITEM 22: The Hollywood Reporter said, “Rosie O’Donnell Has Moved to Ireland After Trump Election: ‘It Has Been Heartbreaking.’ ”
Heartbreaking. We hear you, Ireland, but if we can survive 62 years with her, so can you.
ITEM 23: Peter St Ong tweeted, “Inflation falls by *half* in Trump’s first CPI report.”
Well, there go our COLA raises in Social Security next year.
ITEM 24: John Bolton said, “Trump only wants a ceasefire in Ukraine so he can get good publicity and a Nobel Peace Prize.”
The Neocon Orange Man Bad Laboratory finally came up with the dumbest reason to hate Trump: he wants peace.
ITEM 25: Castreau resigned as the queen of Canada.
Mary Simon remains its governor.
ITEM 26: Rick Moran reported, “AOC Is So Mad at Schumer Over His Support for the CR, She May Primary Him.”
I hear the train wreck comin’, it’s rolling ’round the bend
And I ain’t had so much fun since I don’t know when
ITEM 27: BBC reported, “Migrant deported in chains: ‘No one will go to US illegally now.’ ”
Biden was right. Republicans will have you in chains.
ITEM 28: Radar Online reported, “Dumped Host Joy Reid Set to Scream Bloody Murder Over Being Axed from MSNBC—‘She Knows Where the Bodies are Buried and Is Getting Set to Torch Network to Ground!’ ”
Let’s see, I cannot decide whether she will accuse the network of discrimination, racism or being apartheid.
ITEM 29: Forbes reported, “Judge William Alsup ordered the Departments of Defense, Veterans Affairs, Energy, Treasury and Agriculture to reinstate probationary employees who were terminated as part of the Trump administration’s mass firings of federal workers.”
He’s a judge in the San Francisco District. Shouldn’t his ruling apply only in his district?
ITEM 30: Igor Bobic tweeted, Democrat Senator and “Mark Kelly has turned in his Tesla for a Chevy SUV.”
Instead of saving the planet, Kelly is going to burn it all down to own Elon Musk. But Elon already sold him the Tesla and pocketed the money.
ITEM 31: WSJ reported, “Japan Beer Maker Asahi Looks to Invest More in the U.S. as President Trump Wields Tariffs.”
My only advice to the company is don’t hire Dylan Mulvaney as your spokesman.
ITEM 32: NBC tweeted, “U.S. friction with Ukraine has NATO leaders raising military spending, fueling shares of weapons makers and helping power European stocks to their strongest start to any year since 1998.”
MUGA.
Make U-rup Great Again.
ITEM 33: ABC reported, “One of the three baby bald eagles that went viral in California earlier this month appears to be missing from its nest, eagle-eyed viewers noticed Friday.”
Must have gotten an Only Fans deal.
ITEM 34: CBS reported, “In address about vision for Justice Department, Trump airs grievances about prior investigations into him.”
They spied on my campaign, launched one hoax and disinformation operation after another, broke the law, persecuted my family, staff and supporters; raided my home at Mar-a-Lago; and did everything in their power to prevent me from becoming the President of the United States.”
But in the end, the thugs failed, and the truth won. Freedom won, justice won, the democracy won, and the American people won.
Old: A republic, if you can keep it.
New: A republic, if you can take it back.
FINALLY, columnist Ruth Marcus wrote, “Why I left the Washington Post.” She had been there 40 years, 6 months and 6 days.
OK, without reading the piece, why did she leave
This article first appeared on Don Surber’s Substack. Reprinted here with permission.
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