Fight Iran with pirates

Shiver me timbers. Bloomberg reported:

Arrr! The Department o’ Justice be makin’ ready to wake a long-sleepin’ prize court o’ the high seas, so as to make swift the seizin’ by the king’s men-o’-war o’ them Iranian oil tankers as Yankee prizes—so say three souls what be in on the plot.

Me mateys that means, “The Justice Department is preparing to activate a long-dormant maritime war court to streamline military capture of Iranian oil tankers as U.S. prizes, according to three people familiar with the plans.”

On top of that, Senator Mike Lee and Congressman Tim Burchett proposed bills that would authorize the president to issue letters of marque against drug cartels. Not bad for a couple of landlubbers.

The Constitution allows this hiring of pirates to battle an enemy. Article I, Section 8, Clause 11 says Congress has the power to declare war, grant Letters of Marque and Reprisal, and make Rules concerning Captures on Land and Water.

Now, it has been centuries since we issued such a letter (to Nicholas Millin, captain of the brig Prince of Neufchatel, on December 12, 1814). President Madison used them to battle the British and Canadians in the War of 1812. The USA didn’t have much of a navy while England (our opponent) had the biggest and best navy in the world. Hiring privateers improved our odds.

But though few in number, we had good sailors. Oliver Hazard Perry won the Battle of Lake Erie, informing General “Tippecanoe” Harrison, “We have met the enemy and they are ours.”

Hmm. Lake Perry has a nice ring to it.

Historian Faye Kert found more than 600 American private armed vessels received at least 1,172 letters of marque during the war. The ships needed a letter for each deployment. They were signed by Madison and co-signed by his secretary of state, James Monroe.

If the letters were good enough for the author of the Constitution, they are good enough for President Trump—no matter what Judge and Jury Jimmy Boasberg may think.

The world powers agreed in 1856 to ban pirates, but the USA never ratified the treaty.

Lincoln thought about getting pirates but passed on using them in the Civil War. McKinley also toyed with the idea in the Spanish American War. Again, he rejected it.

But you know Trump. Bloomberg reported:

The Justice Department is preparing to activate a long-dormant maritime war court to streamline military capture of Iranian oil tankers as US prizes, according to three people familiar with the plans.

Reviving prize courts, which is expected to face legal challenges, is intended to strengthen the blockade of Iran and offset the cost of the conflict.

Aaron Reitz, the Houston-based US attorney whose office is partnering with department headquarters on the initiative, confirmed DOJ is “now reviving” prize courts, which he described as an “ancient body of maritime law.”

The unfinalized plans, if adopted, would offer a faster path for federal prosecutors to claim oil and other cargo taken from enemy or neutral vessels as US property. The seized goods would then be sold with proceeds transferred to the treasury.

Iran already uses pirates from Somalia to do its bidding. On top of that, Iran uses terrorists in Gaza, Lebanon and Yemen. They ignore international law, why can’t we?

Just remember, the people who oppose this are the same people who whined all summer about gasoline prices and now protest Trump acquiring 65 billion barrels of oil in Venezuela.

Ron Paul proposed using letters of marque in the Global War on Terrorism.

On October 10, 2001, he said, “Mr. Speaker, I rise to introduce the Air Piracy Reprisal and Capture Act of 2001 and the September 11 Marque and Reprisal Act of 2001. The Air Piracy Reprisal and Capture Act of 2001 updates the federal definition of piracy to include acts committed in the skies. The September 11 Marque and Reprisal Act of 2001 provides Congressional authorization for the President to issue letters of marque and reprisal to appropriate parties to seize the person and property of Osama bin Laden and any other individual responsible for the terrorist attacks of September 11. Authority to grant letters of marque and reprisal are provided for in the Constitution as a means of allowing Congress to deal with aggressive actions where a formal declaration of war against a foreign power is problematic. Originally intended to deal with piracy, letters of marque and reprisal represent an appropriate response to the piracy of the twentieth century: hijacking terrorism.”

How much better off the USA and Afghanistan would be if we sent in the Mafia (or better yet hired the Taliban) to off Osama bin Laden for, oh, a billion bucks.

Instead, we tore up the country, got bored, left, and bequeathed $8 billion in military equipment to the Taliban.

Hindsight for me, but foresight by Paul, for in his speech he said, “Letters of marque and reprisal resolve one of the most vexing problems facing the country: how do we obtain retribution against the perpetrators of the attacks without inflicting massive damage on the Middle East which could drive moderate Arabs into an allegiance with bin Laden and other terrorists. This is because using letters of marque and reprisal shows the people of the region that we are serious when we say our quarrel is not with them but with Osama bin Laden and all others who would dare commit terrorist acts against the United States.”

For my pirate readers:

Arrr, letters o’ marque an’ reprisal be solvin’ one o’ the most vexin’ troubles facin’ the realm: how do we take our rightful reprisal against the scurvy dogs what done the attacks, without layin’ waste to the whole Middle East an’ drivin’ the moderate Arab folk into league with Bin Laden an’ his fellow sea-devils. Aye, ‘tis because usin’ letters o’ marque an’ reprisal shows the people o’ them waters that we mean it when we say our quarrel ain’t with them, but with Osama bin Laden an’ all other black-hearted knaves who’d dare strike terrorist blows against the United States.

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This article first appeared on Don Surber’s Substack. Reprinted here with permission.

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