A (possible) Letter From President Trump to Vice President J.D. Vance, by Patrick Baker

Over at Red State, Ward Clark, Alaska denizen and also sometime contributor here at AFNN, has an interesting piece out on a note President Trump supposedly left in The Resolute Desk for VP Vance, with instructions should something untoward happen to him. 

From the article:

It’s always good to have a Plan B, even if you’re the President of the United States. Granted, presidents generally have a replacement, in the form of the vice president, and in the current term, Vice President JD Vance has proven to be worth his salt. 

Even so, when you’re not just President of the United States, but a guy who has been the target of not one, not two, but three assassination attempts, a little extra contingency planning isn’t the worst idea. President Trump apparently thinks so. Deputy Assistant to the President Sebastian Gorka, on a podcast recently, spilled that President Trump has left Vice President Vance a letter in a drawer of the Resolute Desk, to be opened if the vice president finds himself at that desk after a disaster that results in him suddenly shedding the “vice” part of the title.

While nobody but Trump knows the contents but President Trump, I’ve taken the liberty of positing what such a letter written by Trump might contain, given the torturous path he’s taken to get this far, the state of the World today and of course, his own Trumpian way of expressing himself.

For your reading pleasure: 

JD,

If you’re reading this, then history has just handed you the worst promotion in America. Congratulations—you now own every problem nobody could solve and every opinion nobody asked for.

First rule: everyone will say “this is your moment.” What they mean is “this is now your blame.” Accept both with a straight face and a decent tie.

Second: you’re about to discover that the federal government is less a machine and more a haunted house. Doors open to nowhere, voices whisper contradictory advice, and something expensive breaks every time you touch it. Act confident anyway—it terrifies the ghosts.

Third: you will be told constantly to “bring the country together.” This is Washington code for “please make half the country stop yelling without upsetting the other half that enjoys the yelling.” Smile, nod, and schedule a meeting that solves nothing. It’s tradition.

Fourth: the intelligence briefings will sound like the plot of a thriller novel that failed editing. Read them carefully. Then ask twice, “Are we sure?” Nobody does that enough.

Fifth: if a reporter asks what I would have done, say, “Probably something decisive.” Then do something survivable.

Sixth: somewhere in this building is a binder labeled “Long-Term Solutions.” It has been untouched for decades. Do not open it unless you’re prepared to be blamed for everything in it by Friday.

Seventh: remember that foreign leaders will suddenly be very polite to your face and very busy behind your back. That’s not new—that’s just diplomacy without the small talk.

Finally: if at any point you feel completely in control, assume you’ve missed something important.

Good luck. You’ll need less advice than people think—and more patience than anyone admits.

—D.J.T.

P.S. If anyone tells you “this will calm down soon,” they are either new here or lying. Possibly both.

Editor’s Note: The “letter” above first appeared as my comment in Ward Clark’s original article. 

 

Patrick Baker

Patrick S. Baker is a U.S. Army veteran and retired federal civil servant who holds degrees in history, political science, philosophy, and education. Since 2013, he has written professionally with his work appearing in Strategy and Tactics, Military History Magazine, Sci Phi Journal, and others. In his downtime he plays golf, works out, travels, and enjoys life with his wife and their pets in Florida.

 

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