Don Surber gives us a tour of this week’s news items. He’ll make you think harder than the media outlets, that’s for sure. Enjoy!
ITEM 1: The Wall Street Journal reported, “U.S. Races to Set Up Quarantine Facility in Kenya for Americans Exposed to Ebola.”
I should hope so. The last thing we need is another disaster from Kenya.
ITEM 2: CNN reported, “A Kenyan high court has temporarily frozen plans by the United States to establish an Ebola quarantine and treatment facility in Kenya—which has not recorded any Ebola cases—for Americans potentially exposed to the deadly virus in Democratic Republic of Congo, more than 1,500 miles away.”
Dang. Obama appointed judges there, too.
ITEM 3: Barry tweeted, “You know the NFL season is right around the corner when players start getting arrested.”
It was only domestic abuse. For real controversy in the NFL, you have to appear on a stage at a rally with a president.
ITEM 4: Texas Democrat Senate nominee James Talarico said, “Our trans community needs abortion care too.”
This is why he will turn Texas blue—which is a euphemism for dying.
ITEM 5: The Telegraph reported, “Spielberg: Soulless AI should never have final say in film-making.”
Absolutely. Only soulless CEOs should decide.
ITEM 6: The Center Square reported, “ExxonMobil shareholders approve plan to redomicile to Texas.”
New Jersey’s new state song is All My Exxons Now Are Texans.
ITEM 7: Fox reported, “A former senior U.S. government official with top secret security clearance was arrested after the FBI raided his Virginia home and discovered a staggering $40 million stash of gold bars, $2 million in cash and 35 luxury watches, court documents reveal. David J. Rush was arrested May 19 and is facing federal charges for theft of public money after allegedly swindling the government out of tens of millions of dollars while posing as a highly decorated Navy Reserve captain and Air Force test pilot.”
Someone ratted on him.
That’s right. He was gold-fingered.
ITEM 8: Just the News reported, “A federal judge on Thursday cleared the way for President Donald Trump to implement his executive order tightening mail-in voting, slapping down Democrats’ arguments for now that federal efforts to police voter rolls with citizenship checks was illegal.”
Didn’t Democrats assure us no illegals voted, so why are they suing?
ITEM 9: The 11th Circuit Court reprimanded a federal judge in Atlanta for having sex with a cop in her chamber that was so loud people complained.
Apparently there are noise ordinances in federal buildings.
Obama appointee, which proves his judges don’t just screw citizens out of their rights.
ITEM 10: News Max reported, “Canadian Prime Minister Mark Carney called for a ‘new partnership’ with the United States to ‘help make America great again,’ in a speech delivered in New York on Thursday.”
Make America Great Again by staying on your side of the border.
ITEM 11: Andrew Leyten tweeted, “Police responded to a call for the sound of gunshots at the home of Supreme Court Justice Amy Coney Barrett last night, but quickly realized it was a swatting call and cleared after meeting with her security detail.”
What was James Dougherty’s worst decision: divorcing Marilyn Monroe before she was a star or inventing the SWAT team?
ITEM 12: Iran International reported, “Palestinian foreign ministry condemns ‘Iranian attacks’ against Kuwait.”
It is pretty bad when your sock puppet turns against you.
ITEM 13: They want to put Trump on the $250 bill.
Would it be in poor taste to suggest putting Scott Bessent on the $3 bill?
It would? OK. I won’t then. How about Harriet Tubman on the $20?
ITEM 14: Jill Biden said she thought Joe was having a stroke when his brain turned to mush in the 2024 debate with Trump.
It was her way of reminding everyone that she is an EdD—not a medical doctor.
ITEM 15: Trump replied, “Jill Biden is now out there finally admitting that she did NOT know what went wrong with Sleepy Joe during our spectacular, and highly rated, 2024 Presidential Debate, where Joe was not exactly performing to the highest level of debate standards. She said that she thought he was having a ‘stroke,’ and various other really bad things, and yet never rushed onto the stage to help her troubled husband, as any good wife would do. The only thing she failed to mention was how well I was doing prior to his near total collapse. In other words, as many have asked, did my strong performance in that debate cause him to plain and simple ‘choke,’ leading to his ignominious defeat, or were other reasons the cause? Nobody else knows the answer to that, BUT I DO!!!”
We all know what happened. Obama wanted FJB out and moved the debate up to June, took away his meds, watched the disaster unfold, and waited for him to drop out.
And waited.
And waited.
And that’s how we got President Harris.
ITEM 16: CBS hired Nick Bilton to be the new head of 60 Minutes. In an introductory letter to staffers, he said:
Think back to September 1968, when the first episode of 60 aired. A gallon of gas was thirty two cents. The first pocket calculator wouldn’t go on sale for another two-and-a-half years. If you needed money, you went to the bank, stood in line, and asked a human being for it. Long distance calls were billed by the minute and you thought twice before making one. There were three networks. Most people watched the first episode of 60 Minutes in black and white. If you missed it, you missed it.
Now we know who’s to blame for $4.50 gasoline, cellphones and Netflix.
60 Minutes.
ITEM 17: Iran International reported, “An Iranian lawmaker said on Thursday that a possible agreement with the United States would violate the Supreme Leader’s red lines on the Strait of Hormuz, the nuclear issue, compensation and Lebanon.”
The last time we crossed an ayatollah’s red line was on February 28 when Israel landed a Blue Sparrow missile on his head.
ITEM 18: News Max reported, “Secretary of State Marco Rubio said Wednesday that the United States has secured agreements with 20 countries to accept migrants living in the U.S. illegally who refuse to return to their home nations, describing the deals as a key part of the Trump administration’s immigration enforcement strategy.”
As my bartender always says at closing time, “You don’t have to go home, but you can’t stay here.”
ITEM 19: Gateway Pundit reported, “Republican Tennessee Rep. Tim Burchett is calling for the return of hanging as a federal execution method in response to one of the most depraved crimes in recent memory: the months-long torture, rape, and murder of 19-year-old Isabella Stroupe in Charlotte, North Carolina.”
Hanging is too good for them. Just drop them from a 10th floor window. Splat. Put a tarp down to make cleaning up easier.
ITEM 20: The New York Post reported, “Ryan Breslow, the brash CEO of Bolt Financial, made a splash last week when he announced that he’d quietly abolished his financial technology firm’s entire human resources department earlier this year.”
When I looked at the rules they laid down when I was working, I always thought H.R. was puffing stuff. They’re no friends when things get rough.
ITEM 21: The New York Post reported, “Sex therapist who vowed to put ‘American Zionists’ into ‘castration’ centers loses Texas Democrat primary.”
Hitler was like whoa. She’s crazier than I was.
ITEM 22: CNBC reported, “Mercedes-Benz could find itself shut out of the U.S. auto market—banned from making or selling new vehicles in the country—under legislation making its way through Congress.”
Lou Ann, don’t you buy me no Mercedes Benz.
Owned by Chinese now, they just ain’t our friends.
First time in my lifetime, I praise Congress evidently.
So, Lou Ann, won’t you buy me a British Bentley.
That was for my wife.
ITEM 23: PJ Media reported, “The Democrats’ Greatest Fear: The GOP Will Turn James Talarico Into a Creepy, Unmanly Weirdo.”
He already turned by topping Tampon Tim with Abortions For Men.
ITEM 24: The New York Post reported:
President Trump declared Friday that he has “no interest in continuing” to oversee operations and renovations at the Kennedy Center—and will move to transfer those responsibilities to Congress—after a federal judge ordered his name to be removed from the performing arts venue.
District Judge Christopher Cooper ruled that within 14 days all physical signage bearing Trump’s name must be removed from the building and all references to a “Trump Kennedy Center” must be eliminated from official materials, in response to a lawsuit by Rep. Joyce Beatty (D-Ohio), who is an ex-officio member of the institution’s board.
Better yet, let Judge Obama Appointee run it.
The Kennedy Center—America’s white elephant.
BEST OF TWITTER:
FINALLY, I end on a serious note, retweeting from Newt Gingrich:
After spending this week reviewing the Iranian war I am now convinced President Trump is on the edge of an historic victory. The real breakthrough for me came as I reviewed President Trump’s decisions and maneuvers not from the standpoint of American unilateralism but from the standpoint of the leader of a remarkable historic coalition, the largest coalition ever put together in the modern Middle East.
Everyone understands that Israel is an important ally. What is little discussed is the depth of support from the United Arab Emirates, Qatar, Bahrain, Saudi Arabia and other countries in the region. It has to be sobering for the Iranian dictatorship to realize that it does not have a single ally willing to challenge the American naval blockade. Slowly, gradually, timidly, our European allies are lining up to help with the Persian Gulf and the Strait of Hormuz.
A great deal of President Trump’s maneuvers against Iran make sense once he is seen as a coalition leader and not just as a unilateral American President. I spent a lot of the last couple weeks reviewing kinetic options including wining the battle of the Persian Gulf and the Strait of Hormuz and if necessary using the shocking and shattering level of force President Nixon and Secretary Kissinger used against Hanoi and Haiphong in Christmas 1972 (which both leaders believed convinced the North Vietnamese to agree to a truce and the freeing of American POWs).
If this were a unilateral American campaign I could enthusiastically support a more aggressive kinetic campaign. However it is also clear it would shatter the coalition because our Arab allies are convinced Iran could still do enormous damage to their oil fields and infrastructure. Coalitions are inherently slower than unilateral campaigns. However coalitions ultimately bring vastly more power to the fight.
I am as frustrated as everyone else by the pace of talking with the dictatorship but having reviewed the correlation of forces and the options available to the coalition on one side and the Iranian religiously motivated dictatorship on the other I am prepared to assert that President Trump’s coalition leadership (something almost none of his critics want to acknowledge) is within reach of an enormous historic victory.
And if the Iranian dictatorship ultimately proves it is hopelessly committed to a suicidal position there will be plenty of time for a kinetic campaign of enormous power and effectiveness. Either way we are on the edge of an astonishing victory for our values and for a safer Middle East.
I told you 9 years ago this picture would be on the final exam.
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This article first appeared on Don Surber’s Substack. Reprinted here with permission.
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