Citizen Writers Fighting Censorship by Helping Americans Understand Issues Affecting the Republic.
I come from a long line of porch sitters. This is why I am always on my porch. In my neighborhood, I am affectionately known as “that weirdo freak who’s always on his porch.” This is usually said in a positive way.
Frankly I don’t know anything about the business of writing. And I’ll let you in on a secret, neither do the publishers, editors, marketing teams, or prof reeders. This is why the publishing industry has perhaps the highest turnover rate among employees except for, perhaps, the mafia.
Everything really is bigger in Texas. The sky. The hamburgers. And of course, the oversized tourist cowboy hats found in gas stations.
I am in the lobby of my hotel, waking up. The coffee is lukewarm. The breakfast is freezer burnt. And the overhead music playing is “Highway to Hell.” You can’t get away from canned music. It’s everywhere.
Well, folks, it finally happened. Some mad scientist in his garage just cracked the code, and now lightsabers are real. You heard that right—Jedi-level plasma blades, humming and slicing through anything in their path, are now a reality.
I receive a lot of remarks in the form of emails, private messages, obscene hand gestures, etc. There’s no way I could answer all comments individually. So occasionally, I compile commonly asked questions and answer them in this column.
Once upon a time, in the blissful simplicity of Eden, God gave Adam a straightforward task: name the animals. And Adam, being a practical man (and let’s be honest, not yet bogged down by bureaucracy), did exactly that
I remember my first cellphone. I felt like one bad hombre.
I was in my mid-20s. The cellphone retail salesperson outfitted me with a state-of-the-age phone about the size of a residential General Electric refrigerator.
The Idiot, The Atlas, and The Algorithm, A Three-Part Satirical Series on the Glorious Decline of American Civilization;
Part 2: Welcome to Galtlantis—Where Smart People Hide From the Apocalypse
Released in 2006, Idiocracy is a dystopian comedy film directed by Mike Judge, co-written by Judge and Etan Cohen, and produced by 20th Century Fox.
The January snow/ice storm kept us snowbound for seven days. My farm tractor couldn’t move the 4” of snow on top of the 2” of ice that was over the 6” of the first snow on our ¾ mile driveway.
America has given the world some of its most beloved foods, and yet, when it comes to culinary prestige, we’re treated like the fast-food drive-thru of global cuisine.
In today’s episode from the first year of his regime, the old man learns about holidays and regulations, and the truth about California.
In today’s episode from the first year of his regime, the old man visits a one-party town in this alternate universe that looks an awful lot like Chicago…
Let us talk about some pleasant things like Jim Gaffigan, a rare mainstream comic these days who makes me laugh.
In today’s episode from the first year of his regime, the old man is called out on his staff’s sharing of confidential information.
In today’s episode from the first year of his regime, the old man is in Michigan, on an overnight trip pitching his regime’s latest bill to friendly audiences.
In today’s episode from the first year of his regime, the new soup aide tries to answer the old man’s disjointed questions about Sweden.
Political Satire: Having trouble surviving these times? You’re not alone. Join us in columnist John F. Di Leo’s exploration of an alternate universe, where we imagine the impossible: Joe Buckstop, an aging, corrupt old fool, somehow becomes president in his basement, and every night, an aide has to bring him his soup and discuss the …
In today’s episode from the first year of his regime, a young boy saving up for college brings the old man his soup.