Not One Penny More
The last penny has been minted. The humble American “pence” shall be no more. It’s too expensive to produce. It just doesn’t make sense. No pun implied.
Sean Dietrich
The Lost Art of Porch Sitting
I was raised on porches. I love a good porch. Especially old ones. The haint blue ceilings. The swinging ferns. The skidmarks from when I rode my bike off the porch for a New Year’s Eve party.
It’s All in the Headlines
What about the headlines you never see? Does anything good ever happen? How come you watch the news and see all the godawful things that happened, but never see anything positive, save for a 45-second wrap-up story about a domesticated pig at a nursing home.
The Story of a Veteran
She was born in 1821 in the humble town of Winchendon, Massachusetts. She must have been a spirited baby because she was a spirited woman.
You Can’t Do That No More
I got to thinking about the ever-growing list of things you can’t do anymore. And I’m not talking about the big things, such as smoking unfiltered Camels in the maternity-ward waiting room. Actually, it’s not a “maternity ward” anymore. It’s the “labor and delivery unit.” “Maternity ward” is a sexist term implying that only women have babies.
The Old Preacher
The Baptist church in Brewton was decked for a funeral. Men wore ties. Women wore dresses. The occasional elderly woman in a floral hat was seen wandering the premises. You don’t see many floral hats anymore.
We were burying the preacher today.
Oh, How Times Have Changed
When my grandfather was born, they still used horses and buggies. One third of Americans were farmers. Irving Berlin was a household name. Newspapers were the only form of mass communication available except for maybe shouting. Entertainment was different, too. People entertained each other. Books were luxury items.
The Little Girl and the Gardener
The following is a true story. The little girl was walking with her mother. They were taking a stroll through the hospital garden, bathed in the dappled sunlight of early afternoon, looking at all the flowers in bloom.
Don’t Ever Grow Up
Dear Kid,
Don’t grow up. Don’t turn into an adult. That’s my advice. Resist adulthood. Be a kid forever.
Right now, a lot of adults are angry in America. To be fair, we have a lot to be angry about. But adults can behave badly when they are angry. So please forgive us.
Delay the Friendly Skies
The airport was slammed. We checked in at the kiosk. Checked our luggage. Then stood in a four-mile line so that TSA agents could fondle us. Then we rushed to our terminal, hauling our baggage, just in time for…Our flight to be delayed.
Two Farm Guys
It was a rural area. Hundreds of acres of almond trees. The scent of organic fertilizer filling the air. Two farmworkers were repairing a broken tractor near Avenue 8 and Road 23 ½ in Madera County. That’s when they noticed something. The men saw a school bus on fire.
Twenty-Seven Names
On Interstate 71, just outside Carrollton, Kentucky, stands a lone highway sign. It’s a small sign, DOT-green, no frills. Easy to miss. But it’s there. The sign reads, “SITE OF FATAL BUS CRASH—MAY 14, 1988.” That’s all.
Hotel Breakfasts
The hotel lobby. Early morning. The dining room is filled with people all eating complimentary breakfasts of plasticized food-like matter.
All Saints Day
Yesterday was All Saints Day. A holiday that was started during ancient Rome, when Christians were killed for sport. “Hallows Eve,” was simply a prayer vigil traditionally held on the night before this holiday. A holiday intended for remembering martyrs.
About Us
We were newlyweds, living in a grungy apartment. Each morning, I would wake before her. I would pass my morning hours writing poetry on a yellow legal pad, sipping coffee.
The Story of Me
I sort of raised myself. My dad died when I was a kid. He died by suicide, shortly after he’d been released from county lockup on bail. His death was dramatic. It made the papers. On his final night, he almost took my mother to the grave with him.
The Social Experiment
It was a social experiment. Nothing more. We were in an elevator. Me and Bill. Bill is an academic researcher, dealing in human behavior. Also rats. He knows a lot about rats. Whereas I am a redhead.
Challenge Accepted
Natalie Grabow, of Mountain Lakes, New Jersey, has just become the oldest woman to finish the Ironman World Championship Triathlon. Amazingly, Natalie only learned how to swim around age 60. Today, Natalie is 80 years old.
My Little School
It was late. I pulled into the campus after seven o’clock to attend my last class of the semester. My last college class. Ever. It was a night class. In America, most self-respecting people my age were finishing supper, settling down to watch “Wheel of Fortune.” But I was in school. I had been attending …
The Prettiest Butterfly
What if our souls were like butterflies? Yours and mine. Two butterflies. You and me. Soul mates. And just like butterflies, we were a little bit different from each other? Each with different colors. Different symmetrically patterned wings. Uniquely shaped and sized.