Confessions of a Morning Person
As a boy, I’d awake to find my mother already in the living room, snuggled beneath a lamp, where she’d been reading for hours. The cat in her lap would just stare at me with moral disapproval.
Sean Dietrich
A Walk With My Dog
My dog, Marigold, and I have been walking a lot lately. It’s not easy, walking. We have very few “good walks” inasmuch as walking in a straight line is impossible when you can’t see.
An American Procession
It’s overcast. I’m with my wife and my dog. We are on the wide porch of a vacation rental house. This is the main road which cuts through this small town. There are sounds of kids laughing, playing. Easy traffic.
The American Way
Daddy used his belt buckle to pop open his Coke. He used his teeth to tear open the peanuts. Then he carefully dumped the nuts into the mouth of the bottle. He handed the bottle to me. “Here,” he said. “This is something my daddy used to do. Try it.”
A Few Questions and Answers
I receive a lot of remarks in the form of emails, private messages, obscene hand gestures, etc. There’s no way I could answer all comments individually. So occasionally, I compile commonly asked questions and answer them in this column.
Oh My Dog
“Dear Sean,” the letter began, “there’s a dog in my neighborhood who was lost and followed me home.
Ye Olde Flip Phone
This is my fourth week with a flip phone. My “unintelligent” cellular phone is manufactured by Nokia, and the phone’s primary selling feature is that it sucks.
The Fine Art of Flying
It’s a mess, that’s what it is. When you land in Hartsfield-Jackson Atlanta Third World International Airport, you’re walking into a battle zone.
Norman
I have a thing for Norman Rockwell. When I was a kid, I collected Rockwell memorabilia in the form of calendars, picture books, and posters.
Geneva County: One day in Alabama
The Pleasant Hill Baptist church sits out in the country. The fellowship hall is a sardine can.
It is an old room with drooping ceiling fans, paned windows, and carpet stains that predate the Vietnam War.
Slocomb, Alabama
Dear Aaron,
You are my best good friend. In many ways, you are the brother I never had. I’m not sure that’s a title you want to bear. I’m sort of a degenerate.
But I love you, brother. So help me, I do.
Our Angels: A few people you never met
Northview High School lost one of their own a few weeks ago. Students returned after spring break and their world was decimated. The teenage security bubble had been shattered.
Senior Kara Santorelli was recently killed on Highway 29. Her car was struck by a vehicle traveling the wrong way. Both drivers died at the scene.
It was godawful.
Dear Soldier: To Servicemen and Servicewomen we overlook
I had a beer with a Marine. We were on his porch. He was barbecuing ribs. I’ll call him Mike, although this is not his real name.
Mike uses a wheelchair. He is a nice-looking soldier. Strong upper body. Head of silver hair. He likes Miller High Life because “It’s what my dad always drank,” he says.
Dear Sean
The letter came via snail mail. Sealed in a blue envelope. The return address was Chicago. I’ve been to Chicago. It snowed for three days. In March.
When You Wish Upon a Star
I saw a shooting star. A big one. I was exiting Walmart. Pushing my buggy. It was dusk. The sky was pink. I looked into a cloudless sky and there it was.
A Few Good Men—And Women, of Course
“A lot of people might think the world is falling apart,” he wrote to me. “But they’re wrong. I’ve been on the other side. There’s lots of good people out there.”
I Ran Into Myself Today: He was standing at the water fountain.
I always wondered what I’d do if I met him. I always wondered how I’d act if I met Young Me.
Well, this was my chance to find out.
Marigold The Muse: And then along comes a dog
BIRMINGHAM, Ala.—I was trying to write a column about what’s doing in Alabama when a blind dog wandered into my office. This dog crawled into my lap, started snoring, and began emitting smells. Powerful smells.
The Grand Ole Opry: A memory
I remember going to see the Grand Ole Opry as a boy. My father drove through the busy city of Nashville. I was five, he was thirty-six.
“Daddy,” I said, “Do you think that there will be anyone famous there?”
“Do I?” he said. “You better know it. There’s always famous people at the Opry, and famous ghosts, too.”
Lebanon, Tennessee: The nicest town around
People in Lebanon, Tennessee, are funny about their town name.
“If you gon’ say it,” the bartender explains, “say it right. It’s pronounced ‘Leb’nun.'”
I order a beer, attempt to say the name, and perfectly butcher it.
“Keep practicing,” the bartender says.