The Reviews Are In
Today, Sean of the South lampoons comments found on the internet regarding some of the most impactful works of art, literature and other cultural entertainment
Americana
A Cold Night In Louisiana
Somewhere in Louisiana. The Best Western. It’s late. The temperatures are freezing. I cannot feel my extremities. I am pretty sure the rock rolling around inside my shoe is my toe.
Honor in Texas Hill Country
The poster is faded and aged, containing many three-by-five photos, housed in clear plastic sleeves, all in rows, on display for the world to see. The poster calls itself the “Wall of Honor,” even though you’d have to go out of your way to actually notice the poster. Let alone honor it.
Austin The Beautiful
The sun is shining in Austin, Texas. The hotel dining room is full of young people for breakfast. They are all tourists. I can tell this because they are wearing T-shirts that say things like: “Austin is Special.”
The Black history not told; Black History Month usually ignores capitalists and Republicans
February is Black History Month, which liberals bend toward messages of unceasing oppression while shunning the many black historical figures who improved the nation and proved the American dream works for everyone.
The Biggest Winner
Her husband left her with two kids and a Honda. She didn’t even have a place to stay. She moved in with her sister. She worked thankless jobs. And she hardly ever smiled. Not only because she was unhappy, but mostly because she was missing teeth.
National Puzzle Day
Today is National Puzzle Day. So, I bought a jigsaw puzzle at the grocery store. The box features an ornate cathedral with red roses and blossoming foliage. The cathedral is in Germany. The puzzle cost $9 bucks. I almost choked on my gum.
A Story About a Fry Cook
The young man was quiet. He was a lowly fry-cook, salting endless baskets of French fries. Flipping acres of patties. Dropping pre-fried, shrink-wrapped, chemical-preservative-injected chicken breasts into nuclear silos of boiling synthetic lard.
NRA 2.0 or Collapse: The $160 Million Lawsuit and the Price of Division
A house divided cannot stand. Right now, the National Rifle Association is living that proverb in real time, and it’s painful to watch—because for generations the NRA wasn’t just an organization. It was the standard-bearer. The steward. The institution that most Americans, whether they owned a firearm or not, understood as the big dog in the fight over the Second Amendment.
The Rehab Patient
The transmission of her car has given out. Every day, she hitches a ride to work because she is broke.
She works hard. Too hard. And when she’s not cooking in the kitchen of the medical rehab, delivering trays to patients, she’s a full-time single mother.
Tyranny With a Smile: The Lesser Evils Running the Republic
America doesn’t usually lose its freedoms in one dramatic, movie-worthy moment. We lose them the way you lose your hearing at rifle range: one “WHAT?” at a time, until your wife is yelling from the kitchen and you’re just smiling like a happy idiot because you can’t hear the damage anymore.
The Miracle Drug
In the summer of 2099, researchers developed a new groundbreaking drug. When ingested this new medication impaired one’s ability to judge others.
Conservation or Control? The DNR’s Baiting Ban Hypocrisy and the War on Private Property
They tell you baiting bans are about “science.” They say it’s about “wildlife health.” They deliver it in that soothing government voice that always means, “We’re here to help… ourselves.”
The Almighty Attention Span
I was at a barbecue. There were lots of people around, eating, and at some point one of my cousin’s kids rode their Schwinns into the yard. One boy leapt off his bike and sidled up to me. “It’s so quiet out here,” the boy remarked in stupefied wonder.
You Suck
The email came in this morning. “Sean,” the message began. “You are a social media attention whore….” Great way to start the day.
It’s A Sin To Kill A Mockingbird
It’s raining hard. Thundering loudly. Like the world is falling apart. And yet there is a mockingbird outside my window. The bird is unfazed by the downpour.
Civil Defense Starts at the Range: The Forgotten Skill of a Free People
There’s a certain kind of battlefield respect that doesn’t need a movie trailer, a podcast, or a camouflage beard oil sponsor. It’s quiet. It’s ancient. It’s earned. And it belongs to the rifle marksman—the one who can hit what needs to be hit, when it needs to be hit, without turning the entire valley into a fireworks show.
The Peaceful Lake
The old preacher sipped his thermos of coffee, holding a fishing rod in the other hand. He asked what I wanted most in this life. I stared at the lake surface and told him I wanted peace. I was young, I came from a broken home. Peace was all I wanted.
Fuzzy Kitty: A Michigan Crime Story (Featuring Hoodie Bandits, Window Yeeting, and a $1,000 Vet Plan)
So…Let me tell you about Fuzzy.
A gray kitten my wife tried to adopt from the local animal shelter. My wife went in there like a normal, kind human being. She saw a little kitten and instantly fell in love—because that’s what happens when a decent person meets a tiny creature with big eyes and zero survival skills.
The Elegy of the Handwritten Letter
Don’t shoot the messenger. But in America, one third of children have never handwritten a letter. And it’s not just kids. Nearly 40 percent of adult Americans haven’t written a letter in the last five years, while 43 percent of Millenials have never sent one in their lifetime.